Profondément Dans un Tiroir
Tsukue no Hikidashino Oku
Deep Within a Drawer
When my sensei (instructor) passed away, a family member asked for my help to go through his belongings for distribution. Our grief was overwhelming as we emptied his cabinets, closets and boxes. I pulled out one drawer from an old desk and deep within the drawer was a box addressed to me. I opened it; inside were three packages of flowering seeds, an old watch, a bayonet and a note. I read the note; “I purchased this used desk at an estate sale after graduating from the military academy. Deep in the back of the drawer I found these three packets of seeds along with a card telling the previous owner to plant the seeds in memory of a loved one. He also had cards that were written out to other people telling them how lonely he felt and how he felt about them, but the cards were never sent. I thought of how sad the previous owner’s life might have been for not having the time to plant or throw a few seeds or mail his written thoughts. As for myself, I was fortunate to have a few students and remembered the packets of seeds never planted. So, I began to plant the seeds of knowledge of our tradition in my students. When one sees a plant or a tree, no one ever thinks of how it got there, who planted it, or how it was nurtured. All one sees is the outcome of its growth and how it may outshine all of what is in nature around it. My three students were like the packages that were filled with seeds. Your knowledge will burst and rip open the fabric that will let the many seeds out and your nurture will allow them to grow. No one should die with their feelings and knowledge hidden away; for then, they truly die. Take my old watch, the time has stopped; keep it that way, for in the fabric of time we are only less than a second before our death. All of our time has stopped, so we must act as though there is no time left. Take my knife and cut the cords that may tie you down to hinder your accomplishments.”
Many others lose loved ones and are left with documents, history and memories. I was left with knowledge, spiritual understanding, respect, guidance, but most of all, a love of a tradition named Kazemura Yama Arashi ryu and its instructor, Leonard Samuel Marshall. All he left me were some simple packets of flowering seeds to plant and flourish, a watch that can no longer keep time, and a knife that set my inner self free. As these items were found deep within the desk drawer, it is now deep within my thoughts, mind and spirit.
By: Henri-Robert Vilaire
Dedicated to Beatrice Vilaire-Ramirez, Leonard Samuel Marshall, Robert Nishiyama, Tung Ku Ling, Jim Rooney, Andres Pell and Andrew Boxer, who are so sadly missed. Also, to my students for having shown me the path to being an instructor, and to my children for showing me a path that flowers on all sides.